A message from Anonymous

i recently found out that my ex (we broke up a month ago) started dating someone. i know shes doing it to make me jealous. do you think i should just show up where she hangs out with a girl to make her jealous too? i know its a bit immature but i can't let her feel like she won.

lol how old are you man? you sound like a younger me.

shes your ex. she’s free to date whoever she wants, whether its to make you jealous or if she found the love of her life.

good news is, you are free to do the same!

i used to be like you man… i needed to be the “winner.” like it was some sort of sick game. but in the end, if you play this game, you lose. because while shes out living her life, being with someone she wants to be with, you’re sitting there conjuring up ways to get her to notice you.

move on with your life. go read a book. its getting nice out, go to the park and shoot some hoops. hang out with your guy friends. befriend women and be friends with them, don’t try to conquer them. try new restaurants with your friends. get drunk. pull an all nighter watching a new tv series. anything is better than sitting there moping about what you once had.

good luck man. as cliche as it sounds, time does heal all wounds. you’ll be alright.

A message from Anonymous

I have this kinda crush on my bestfriend for 2 years or so and I cant hold it anymore i know he doesnt like me (im not his type) any advice?

10th grade
As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called “best friend”. I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said “thanks” and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn’t want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said “thanks” and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.

Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick” she said; he’s not going to go well, I didn’t have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as “best friends”. So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn’t think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said “I had the best time, thanks!” and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, “you’re my best friend, thanks” and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say “I do” and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn’t see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said “you came!”. She said “thanks” and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.

Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my “best friend”. At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn’t notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love him but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too…` I thought to my self, and I cried. ”

TELL HIM!!!!

A message from Anonymous

you seem like a really chill dude and i imagine you are very sociable, especially when you go out to events and such in nyc. im wondering how you approach girls, or just how do you talk to them when you first meet them? do you just talk about fashion? i imagine if you're meeting someone at your events, you both have similar interests so its easier. im not overly shy, just dont know how to start a conversation.

Thanks for the kind words. I’m actually really awkward and shy but here’s what I do… there’s a few steps involved.

Well first, you see my profile picture on the left side? That picture makes me look like a photographer. Girls love taking selfies, we all know this… but you know what they love more than taking selfies? When someone else takes good photos of them. So I pretend I’m a photographer and offer to take their picture. When she asks me to take a photo of her and her friends on her iphone, I agree and I pretend to not really know how to work it because I use an Android phone but meanwhile, I’m just dialing my number so I have her number on my phone. Then it’s all about strategically texting her until she finally gives up and agrees to go out with me.

Not too difficult.

Good luck homie.

A message from Anonymous

How can I make the girl I've been dating fall in love with me?

“You cannot make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.”